Common Advice For the EditStock Free Sample Scene


Editor: Anonymous

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Overall, your pacing pretty good, but there were a few spots I thought you could "tighten it up" a bit. That means removing some frames from the head or tail of a cut. For example at 0:45 after the line "and you just left him in there?" I would tighten Levi's tail a bit.

I think you missed at least one good opportunity for "the actor's business." At 0:36 John grabs Levi's face.  It would be nice to see Levi's face being smushed. 

I recommend doing a pass where you try putting in as much physical acting as possible.  Just try a version like that and resubmit it.  It's not that it becomes "the best" scene, but  I think it's great practice.



Editor: Anonymous

SELECTED NOTES: Watch official version.

The lines at the end; Levi "you just left your boss laying on the ground what is wrong with you?" Then John, "he's going to kill me." Those are really important because they are not just jokes, they have real implications of what's going on. This is what the characters think is going to happen next. My advice is to put those on screen.

At 0:47 I might try a version where John's line, "I think he slipped and fell on the stall next to me" might be important to have on screen. It might be clear enough to the viewer because they've seen what happened, but I would try a version with it and see if you like it. I think it's important because John is confessing his crime. 

Editor: Anonymous

SELECTED NOTES: Watch official version.

Overall your pacing was excellent! The air between jokes was mostly quick, though jokes that needed a second to land (like the eye twitch) were given time. Great job picking angles as well.  The important lines were on camera and we showed lots of physical humor. At the beginning of the scene when John goes to sit down, I think we can lose his close up. This way we can save his first close up for a joke, and we don't cut out of that nice dolly shot too early.

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